Thursday, April 8, 2010

will i make it?

to bikram yoga today?????
sadly, jamie (my husband) had to leave on a red-eye last night for baltimore. his granny is very sick and he wanted a chance to see her before...well, i'll just leave it at that. i do hope has has a nice visit with his mom and family, and granny.
i went to yoga last night before i took him to the airport. it was a bit of a problem for my marriage...jamie wanted me to stay home and be with him before he left. and me, well, i am fresh into this passion/obsession thing with bikram yoga and i feel like...as much as i love him, i wanted to go to yoga. it helps me to be more open and loving, and to me, that helps my marriage. so, I went. and i hope he understands. it was a great class. at first i wasn't crazy about the teacher, he was fast talking, not very gentle. look at me, 5 days of this yoga and i am getting picky about the teachers. but i ended up having a great class. really getting into the poses a little more, learning the form, and working a little harder without being overwhelmed. i jsut cannot explain how good i feel during and after class. and i really look forward to going. i never felt that way about anything before. i liked going to the gym, but i didn't look forward to it. i like painting, but even getting out the supplies and the thought of having to clean the brushes gave me sloth-like motivation. i did love the dancing, but i certainly found it easy to sit on my ass and not practice everyday. and now here i am without my husband for the weekend, and how will i get to yoga? i really want to go. and that in and of itself is so big for me. the only things i ever really wanted to do before was go out to eat or go get drinks.
speaking of eating and drinking. since i started the bikram yoga, those habits have changed. after that first night of horrible headache, i have adjusted my diet. only whole fruits and veggies and grains. no wheat, sugar, dairy. (ok, except for the cream in my coffee...i do have coffee every morning, come on, i am not that pure) so far, it feels great, my body deserved a break. food has been such a go-to substance for me. i do feel a little, like i am on the other extreme right now. eh, live and learn. we'll see how it all shakes out. like i have said in earlier posts, i am fearful of this not sticking around. but no sense in worrying about that, just keep breathing and feeling good for now.
so, now onto watching the kids i have at my house today....and figuring out a way to get to yoga!
xoxomelissa

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