Part 3: Chicken Soup Kills the Soul

I like pretzels, but I'm not making them every day.
Photo by Amy Baranski

Posted by Amy Baranski
Continued from Part 2: Enterprising

I had serious doubts.  After calling Cookspace, finding out their rates, and learning from the owner that several meal delivery services nixed their leases when the economy crashed, a pretty gloomy picture of our Soup and WOW! Pretzels Too! enterprise started shaping up. Without an alternative, I worried Melissa would think I was breaking up with her.

When we sat down, Melissa looked me dead in the eye and said: I’m not really excited about soup.

Was this a dare? Or, was this an I like eating soup and making soup every day will kill my soul kind of moment? It all came out. Since January I’ve been enrolled in a gardening/horticultural program, and Melissa’s been pursuing a path of birthing assistant work for some time now. On top of that we’re doing the blog for a whole year. These interests have nothing to do with meal delivery services, although I’m sure some far-fetched connections could be made.

So, in our typical fashion we spent time processing and unanimously closed the books on the Soup and WOW! Pretzels Too! business. We uncovered a simple fact (that was with us all along) which is our mutual interest lies in this blog, and wherever it takes us. And, if that’s just right here that’s fine. But, unquestionably there's more to learn and do.

We took the business plan template (it’s a PowerPoint document for all of you interested in such details) and started plugging in information about our blog. This includes background and historical facts, along with marketing efforts (those undertaken in 2010 and 2011 opportunities), our personal strengths, a description of our project, how we operate, and many other things.

Let's Discuss!

If there’s a lesson here it’s that sometimes the best choice is to simply work with what you’ve got. So I'm interested if you've ever come to this point in your own life...here's some (ahem) food for thought. Please share your experiences by commenting below.

• When do you over-complicate things?
• How have you reached further than you needed for something? 
• When and how have you experienced success with trying something new?

Just click “comment” at the end of the post. Type your thoughts in the box. Select a profile to sign your name (you can simply select your name or anonymous). Click “post comment”.

Cheerios,
Amy

Trapper Keeper dreamin'

This just in!  I have a new binder for the blog!

Last night, just before we started our shared viewing of Star Wars: episode 1, Amy ran upstairs to get something.  She came back in holding two black binders, each with the same calendar cover and the title:  2011 - Good Luck with That!  Not only was I super excited because I always get excited when Amy shows interest in the blog, but I totally felt like I was back in middle school or high school when you get your new binder for the year.  I remember that so fondly, and the hope and comfort it would bring.  I hugged my new binder right up close to my heart...and I knew this was for real.

Today I have spent hours working on various aspects for the blog.  And I love every minute of it.  I could spend hours on it; researching ways to get it more visible on the web, finding resources for whatever it is we are working on...like the business plan, meeting with Amy.  Today at our meeting she had this whole power point template filled in with graphs and examples of the blog pages.  It looked awesome.  and here's is where I will share our business plan...turns our it is going to be the blog!  We had thought we were going to start a soup delivery service, all on bicycles and with pretzels too.  And while I love to cook and I also love pretzels, there was no mayonnaise involved...no just kidding, it turned out all at the same time that both Amy and I were feeling weighted down by the idea.  We were excited about writing a business plan, but if we were going to spend hours a day and work super hard for something, well, turns out soup just didn't get us jazzed enough to keep us going.  But the blog...now that keeps us going.  So, we are making a business plan, a living document that tracks our progress and defines our goals as we discover what they are.

Even little things, when it comes to internet progress, feel like getting to the top of a mountain pass.  I often feel like I have no idea where I am heading, but like a mountain goat...just keep my feet sure and steady, and take it one step at a time.  Very capricorn.  Here is what I accomplished:

Pairings

I was at my friend's new shop yesterday, Sugarpill.  A truly lovely little spot here on Capitol Hill....herbs, salts, chocolate, bitters, (I got the Blackstrap bitters and Karyn jotted down a cocktail recipe for a gin flip using said bitters and the drink was amazing...thanks, Karyn!) sweet perfumes, local honey, caramel, jam,  soaps, so many sweet little things.  She was asking about what I was doing with the blog and I shared with her it was writing a business plan month...and I kept talking about my leftover pork sandwich.  I don't know how it happened, oh yeah, she said maybe I should make one month about pulled pork sandwiches, and I said that maybe if next month (Tai chi) gets boring I'd add that in.  And then she said...I could create activity "pairings" on the blog, since everyone is into pairing different foods and drinks together these days.  Tai chi and pork.  I kinda love it.

The card Jamie gave me for our anniversary

Relationships are another kind of pairing.  Friendships, marriages, family, business partners.  The older I get I learn more and more and more about how I pair with different people, or how I don't.  How what I bring to the table...maybe bitter, but sometimes sweet, and usually bubbly; how that goes with maybe someone else's flavor, if you will.  I find there is an intuitive thing that happens right upon walking into a room, when you know if you will be a good pairing.  At least that is how it works for me.  Usually.  I have just been thinking a lot about relationships lately.  How we blend together as humans, and sometimes repel each other....and even with the same two people some days can be the best bite of steak you ever had followed by a sip of perfect red wine, and other days can be like milk and sushi (that would be gross.)  I am so grateful for all the relationships,  I have in my life, how they ebb and flow.  They are like the mayonnaise of my life, they go with everything.

And then the "pairing" comes up again when I think of this blog.  Something about doing it with someone else brings so much to the experience.  I couldn't imagine doing it alone, and in fact, when Dina moved away and was blogging less...I felt that loss, I missed having my partner.  And on the other side of that, I think more than two would be too much.  Too many cooks in the kitchen, isn't that the saying?  I love, love, love having Amy be a part of this blog.  I do believe we pair well together.   Like pop-rocks and fun-dip.

So here are some of my first brainstorming ideas on the activity pairings for the blog:
tai chi & pork
mushroom foraging & LSD
poker & praying
bowling & white russians (come on, I had to)
memorizing a poem & mozzarella cheese sticks
hiking & soft pretzels

more to come.  any other ideas???  Please share...

enjoy the sun, if you're in Seattle
-melissa

oh and PS...FYI the vegetables on the blog did have to do with our original business plan, but probably not so much with the actual one we have ended up with.  

Under the Heat Lamp

Beginning of Half-Moon (feet should be together).

First off, it's not a heat lamp. But that's okay. It's the phrase that's been going through my head. Last night it was "under the ceiling fan" and I had this whole moment connected to my childhood that I was going to share with the world here. But I'm not going to do that because I've started, interrupted, and restarted this blog post a million times. And Under the Heat Lamp isn't applicable to what I want to talk about anymore, but I'm forcing myself not to change the title of this post--or erase those first few sentences--because if I do I'll probably just hit "Save as Draft" at the end instead of "Publish" like I'm supposed to in order to stay on track with publishing at least one lengthy post a week. I think people really undervalue the value of the run-on sentence.

Okay, so let's get organized. I want to talk about: business plan month, yoga and other random things that have not articulated themselves yet in my streamofonlineconciousness.

Business Plan

Melissa and I met and talked it out. We laid some honest shit on the table, which Melissa informed me was one of the key steps to creating a business plan that was discussed at the business seminar. It makes sense, and I was relieved, surprised, and affirmed at our ability to be honest about:

• What we want to do
• What we don't want to do
• What we have the ability to do

And wouldn't you know the answer just presented its sweet little self to us, really without much "inventing" effort. So no we're not going to start a food-delivery business. We're going to focus on doing what we are already doing and see what turns up. So let's get down to business and celebrate with some cocktails.

Yoga and other random things with no paragraph breaks

I did not go to yoga on Tuesday and I did not go to yoga last night and I may not go to yoga today. On Tuesday I chilled the fuck out. Last night, I ate at Burgermaster. And today we'll just see how this MO-FO goes. I've been cranky and I don't care. Shit has been falling down in my life outside of yoga, my A-game has turned into a C-game. I have a lot of stuff going on, which yeah I talked about in my last post, but I also need time to be alone and think and chill and read and that hasn't been happening. So balance has been lost. It's probably why I suck balls at Balancing Stick. I just don't understand myself in that pose. Every time everyone else seems to struggle in it, stick in it, even if their form is totally jacked, but I'm always coming out early, standing at the back of my mat looking at all the non-giver-uppers wondering to myself: am I just a quitter? How is it I can stay balanced longer in Standing Head to Knee but Balancing Stick is like being on a god damned balancing beam: my knee buckling and my brain completely disassociated with my body. Last weekend my friend Daemond showed up at class. That made practice really fun. Hi Daemond! (if you're reading). I hope I run into him again at the studio. I'm really thinking about doing another 30 day challenge in March but I kinda wanted to do some weekend trips that month, so I'm torn. I'll let you know what I decide. Maybe you (if there ARE any of you (still) reading this) would want to join us for a 30-day challenge? Think it over. It's practically how I started this practice and it builds a great foundation for yourself. There's a lot to explore in 26 poses and 2 breathing exercises. You might surprise yourself. Beside you can say to yourself: I did 30-days straight of hot yoga. And with that I'm just going to hit Publish Post. See you next time.

Always, Amy.

Victory is sweet, mostly in the 15 year seats

Sitting here listening to Bright Eyes' new album, the People's Key.  I fell in love with Conor Oberst's music with his fist solo album, Conor Oberst.  (seriously, one of the best albums you can buy)  He is an amazing lyricist.  He has an incredible talent to put together instruments and sounds; to create a song, an album, an experience.  So far, one song in, this new album is no exception.  The CD was a gift from Jamie to me, for our 15 year anniversary.  He also got me the Moulin Rouge soundtrack.  I guess you do get to know someone pretty well after that many years.  He used to buy me CD's for every special occasion and it completely enraged me, and now...well, either the choices are more meaningful, or my expectations are less intense.  I say it must be the prior.  Everything is more meaningful after 15 years.  The love, the everyday, the issues, the baggage...but mostly the love.   Just the fact that we are still here after 15 years, after so many reasons to go...come on, we all find reasons to go.  It takes creativity and the ability to see the big picture and patience and forgiveness to be here.  Day after day.  Thankfully.

at the kitchen table, Sitka&Spruce

But back to the blog.  I received our business cards today.  They are awesome!  Simple and straightforward.  Just right.  I only wish I would have had them Saturday night...out to Sitka & Spruce (amazing food and great hosts) and the Paramount to see Rock of Ages.  What a great night!  (as always, with the Riley's.  love you guys!)  And I am sure I could have handed out a few cards...at least to all the wanna-be rockers.  Don't you think that crowd would love this blog?  You know, I am sure I will sing more than a few of those songs during karaoke month!  I can't stop singing them now...."Here I go again on my own..."

But really, back to the blog.  Amy and I met this weekend and we have totally changed the course of our business plan.  After my seminar last Wednesday, and much brainstorming afterwards....I came to see what my true passion, as far as a business goes, right now.  I thought it would be the thing that had to do with the vegetables background on the blog, but no.  Not at all.  I think that was a spark that started the important conversation of being into some kind of business...but then again vegetables often spark a lot of interest for me.  I LOVE food.  Mostly mayonnaise...but vegetables too.  So, at our meeting this past weekend, turns out Amy had been thinking the same thing too.

So, hopefully, somewhere , someday, we will find victory... or success in this business venture.  In much of what i have thought about tonight in this post, it brings to mind a Conor Oberst lyric from his song, Cape Canaveral.


I watched your face age backwards
Changing shape in my memory
You told me Victory is sweet
Even in the deep seats.


and now, I  am melting into the beauty of the "Ladder Song".....
wow.  Good night.

-melissa

I love you. You're stupid. Just kidding!

Looking down from Cape Flattery. Photo by Amy Baranski.

Yesterday during Savasana after Ustrasana (camel pose) my yoga teacher talked about how we might feel. When we first started our practice, she explained, "overwhelmed" is the label we may have assigned to that wave of feeling rushing throughout our joints and mind as we quickly transitioned from our knees to our backs and into Savasana.

Camel pose is the deepest backbend of the Bikram series and at times reminds me of standing on a ledge--a soaring seacliff above craggy rocks looking down on a tangly kelp forrest tipping out from the surf. 

Just the other day Bob asked:

Cinderella dressed in yella

Today is Friday.  It has been two days since the business plan seminar I attended and I have not written a word on any business plan.  Instead I have been busy writing my resume and cover letter, from scratch, because my computer's hard drive crashed back in September and I lost everything.  For the second time.

Can you tell I am in a stellar mood today? ;)  Got my bright and cheery disposition out to shine.

I have to tell you about this morning, I spent it chaperoning Tallulah's class to the Pacific Northwest Ballet's performance of Cinderella.  Some points were so memorable and fun, I truly love hanging out with kids that age, being a sorta teacher like role.  But overall, it is hard to enjoy a ballet performance when 75 kindergartners need to be hushed and gently reminded that the little person in front of them does not like the incessant tapping with the big boots on the back of their chair.  In an effort to tune out the noise, I got caught up in staring at the beautiful Cinderella sign on stage, and drifted off to a day dream where i had a fourth child and named her Cinderella.  And I really thought that was a great idea.  By the time the school bus was turning the corner back to school, the noise level from the constant talking and laughing and sometimes screaming children had numbed my ear drums, and only now, 2 hours later is the ringing subsiding.  Oh, to be a school bus driver...now there's a job that'll drive you to drink.  Or shoot heroin.  Or maybe just drive the big yellow, sound-torture-chamber-on-wheels right into Lake Washington.    But really, there were some sweet moments.

Back to the job search.  To qualify for unemployment, I have to "make contact" with three job possibilities each week.  There is nothing out there that I qualify for.  This week's winners were: customer service for the Herbfarm restaurant, a national medical scheduler (wtf is that?), and an assistant to a funeral home director. Think I'll be going to any interviews?  But at least I have the resume written, even if it isn't that great.

And all this constant thinking about starting a business, writing a business plan, scouring craigslist for job prospects, going to yoga...it has got me thinking a lot about a question that arrises for me, a lot.  "What do I want to do with my life?"  it's like I have career ADD.  I can never seem to settle on one thing.  I think that is why I love this blog so much.  I get to do so many different things, all under the same umbrella of the blog.  Some things stick, like the yoga.  Which I have to say is funny that I love it so much, and love the same-ness of it, considering this ADD thing.  But I would probably get this if I wanted to be a Bikram teacher.  I think it just has to do with my professional life, as if I have one of those.  I should check out my astrological chart on this one.  yea, that was another one of my possible careers...professional witch, what with all the herbs and astrology, i think I may even have a crystal ball somewhere.  Nope, probably got rid of that during "purging my stuff month."

Well, that is where I am at right now.  And speaking of stars and astrology, I am hoping this Gemini moon draws me right into the details, into the nitty gritty bitty pieces of it all...sometimes I get lost when I get all out in the big picture.  I think I'll set some goals for myself for the weekend.

1. Meet with Amy
2. Put my laundry away
3. Go to yoga Saturday and Sunday
4. Decide what to do with my life (just kidding)

xoxomelissa

Court Side

Last night I was at a college basketball game where I sat next to this guy. A short distance to my left was a friend who is working towards an MBA. The seats near us were stuffed with business acumen. A couple thoughts went through my mind:

• Most people wear Jeans. Jeans serve as the great equalizer of America.
• Court side is another golf course--whether on hardwood or turf grass relationships deepen in 110 minutes of hang time and 10 minutes of exchanging business.
• If you're the son of the coach you're a sonofacoach!

-Amy

some real business

The whole business thing got very real today.  I went to a seminar on "Writing a Business Plan" that was hosted by the Seattle chapter of SCORE.  SCORE is an organization that offers free one on one counseling for people starting or owning small businesses.  Retired business professionals offer their services to do the counseling, and teach classes and seminars.  And amazingly enough (I don't know why I find this amazing...maybe because I feel so busy and broke, so I can't imagine offering this much time for free) everyone there, the teachers and the librarian....everyone, seemed truly interested in other people's business success.  Jerry, our main teacher for the day, was telling us a story about one of this clients and he mentioned that he was on the phone with her last night...from his home!  and then emailed this same client at 5am this morning, because he was thinking about her situation and thought of another way to help her.  Wow.  Jerry and our other teachers shared many stories of people like us, with dreams of owning a business or those that has succeeded and then had some pitfall.  Every time Jerry told a story, he used the pronoun "we"; he saw himself as a part of that budding business and has even become long time friends with some of his clients.  I loved the personal stories.

The day started off a little stressful.  Jamie had to work at 7am (thankfully, he is working again right now.) and I had to catch a bus at 7:40am.  The kids need to be to school by 9am.  Thankfully Amy offered to walk the kids to school.  But it hit me at around 11pm the night before that even with Amy walking the kids to school, that left a crucial window of one hour with no one to be with the kids.  With Lily being nearly 11, usually that is not an issue, but in the morning...before school, the variables for meltdowns are too great to leave her with that responsibility.  So again, thankfully, Amy said she would come down at 8am and assist in the getting ready for school thing.  Whew.  I ran out the door and two blocks (uphill) at 7:40 and caught by bus by seconds.  I got all checked in on time at the seminar, and was enjoying the desk to myself, the crappy coffee with powdered creamer, and listening to the small talk about weather when Jerry finally started the day.  I felt fresh and engaged.  Then my phone buzzed.  It was Amy calling.  fuck.  I discreetly texted her to find out that Tallulah was refusing to go to school.  fuck again.

 I left the class and called her from the hallway, and she put TJ (Tallulah June) on the phone.  TJ was whining, loudly.  Crying about hating school, and why can't they go back to Bright Water (the private school we decided we did not want to pay for anymore..plus she cried and held on for dear life when I left her there last year too)  Anyway, after I talked her down off the ledge, I went back into class.  (I later found out it was probably more Lily that helped "the brat" as she fondly refers to her walking to school)  I was way less fresh and engaged, more like cracked out from bad coffee and frazzled from the satellite parenting.  Not to mention feeling horrible about causing Amy duress.  The best part was that Amy texted me to say..."now I feel like I understand more what Louis CK is talking about with the whole parenting thing."

knowns and unknowns

blog at sunrise.

Melissa and I have been meeting early in the morning and late at night, talking about our business plan. We listed out what we want to do and why. And we're in the middle of number crunching (which has more variables than I had thought about). We have a lot of research ahead of us.  

KNOWN: some of the questions we need answered.

UNKNOWN: potential return of invesment.

KNOWN: we're working well together.

On that note, I'm going to hit publish and get ready to walk the kids to school today as Melissa gets prepped for an all-day business seminar downtown.  - Amy

P.S. It goes without saying that this is the most boring blog post I've ever read/written in my life.

You're Hired!

This month, Melissa and I are talking business, doing business, culminating in writing a business plan. It's our own version of The Apprentice, except no one gets fired! We just might go broke.

I've been part of a start-up business, a non-profit business, a corporate business, and I've even owned my own business. A number of my friends are M.B.A.s, one even from Wharton (yes you are detecting an obsession with the Trump family). I've known people who've: acquired venture capitol; invested their trust funds into business; and or scrimped and saved their earnings to invest in their own enterprise.

Who among us hasn't had that million-dollar idea, if not fleeting,during a late night session with friends and a good bottle of wine?

What speaks to me most about entrepreneurship is the potential for world-changing creative output from hard work and collaboration that can lead to sustainable and equitable living...

Speaking of business I have to head out to help scout new locations for this year's hives for the Urban Bee Company (my husband's endeavor). More thoughts on all of the above soon!

As always,
Amy

SAHMWKIS (stay-at-home-mom-with-kids-in-school)

I started my new life as a SAHM (stay-at-home-mom. I have found that these acronyms are quite popular on-line in chat rooms or places where moms go for advice. DH - dear husband, and others are out there, seemingly just to annoy me.) Actually, I have not yet decided whether I am assuming the title of Stay-at-Home-Mom or unemployed mom.  Tallulah told our friend yesterday that I don't work anymore because I am "disabled."  Tallulah is 5.  "My mom doesn't go to work anymore, because at her job, they, um...she is, uh, disabled.  So she doesn't go there anymore, she stays home with me."

Today was day two without a new label, or cool acronym for myself...and apparently, according to my youngest daughter, disabled.  I did not make it to yoga, and was hugely disappointed about that. I really tried.  I got home from Levi's classroom and after making a long overdue call to a friend, while I packed my yoga stuff up, I had 30 seconds to decide if I could walk to the Sweatbox fast enough.  And not only that, could I also get everything else I needed to get done finished after yoga and before I had to get the kids from school? I decided no.  So, I sadly put my yoga bag down and went to the computer to finish the financial aid form for Lily's private middle school she dearly wants to go to. (We go to an interview tomorrow!)  It's funny how I could make it every singe day for 30 days, and then as soon as it was not the priority, it easily can seem impossible to make it there. Or easily seems possible to not make it there.   Very different perspectives with the same outcome.

Plus I have this new month to tackle.  And what a month it is!  Why did I pick business plan??? Researching isn't so bad, but there are aspects that I guess I knew were there...but always ignore.  And these have come up in just the first few days, I wonder what other surprises will be in store for this naive business lady?  My plan was to honestly write everything about my journey as being a total novice to starting a business.   And while I will still do that, it will look perhaps a little different than I had first thought.

I didn't know that it might not be a good idea to tell everything about the business as we blog.  I didn't think that anyone would possibly be out there scouting for ideas and steal ours.   I know I have an idealistic nature, and an aversion to the harsh business world as I think it is.  Sometimes I think it is that belief system that has kept me from my own success.  Maybe I think to be successful you have to play by "their rules" and I don't believe in their rules.  So, this will be interesting, to see how I can come to terms with that.  Do I play the game?   Do I write my own rules and assume if I follow my heart and passion it will all work out as it should?

As of now, I will heed the friend's advice and not give too many details to the business. We'll come up with some code words to disguise our master plan.  For now we have an "idea" and I found this website from the Small Business Administration to get a template and ideas for what we need to think about and get on paper.  I thought this seemed like a reputable place to start.  There are so so may websites out there for this kind of thing, and as  newbie, you just don't know who to trust.

You know, I kind of have a lot at stake here.  If this is something that takes off, the timing couldn't be better.  This month I have the time to put toward this and the motivation to make something happen.  I am tired of working for someone else and working hard to make more money to may for their life.  I am tired to not feeling inspired by my work and having that translate into lower and lower self esteem.  I am in a place in my life, since starting this blog, of growing and becoming stronger, and I am ready for that to translate into my career.

And, Happy New Moon, and Happy Year of the Rabbit!

Lily's art work, age 7

“Let there be peace -- and let it begin with me” is the Rabbit motto. The Tiger makes waves, but the Rabbit mends fences. Diplomacy reigns. If you want to improve your chances of success, negotiate and cooperate rather than force your ideas on others. It’s also a time to kiss and make up. Forgive and forget. Let’s all get along. Make love not war. If last year the emphasis was on excitement, it’s now is on harmony.  -from Astrology.com



So...negotiate and cooperate to improve my chances of success.  Looks like it goes well with my Moon in Libra.  Enough said.  Done and Done.  I am always open to listening to the signs.


and for now the signs and the clock and my eyes are saying...good night.
xoxomelissa