Friday, June 11, 2010

i should've used turtle fabric

cause i am moving so slow.  it's ok.  i think i am afraid to cut the fabric.  so, i keep putting it off.  so, today is day three of being supposed to cut the fabric.  and i have school stuff with the kids all day and i work at night.  maybe tomorrow.  i did iron the fabric last night.  it was really nice to do.  i like ironing, and i hardly ever do it.  the house was clean and quiet....the girls had stayed up late cleaning their room.  which is awesome!  and i let them sit on the couch for a show with me while i ironed.  we watched "Battle on the Block", an HGTV home design do it yourself kind of show.  Lily and i love that stuff.  Tallulah fell asleep immediately (yeah!) and it was just so meditative and sweet, yes, even with the tv on.  candles were lit and i have a new houseplant on the window sill...oh, which i bought when i was finally getting the things for my garden to grow up upon...instead of over the raised bed walls and onto the grass.  i got these cool twirly bamboo sticks for the peas...i hope it works. was very cozy in here last night and i am still kinda feeling the buzz from that.  here's my work in progess...
see, remember just the other day i was sitting in the apartment....thinking i should clean it cause if was so messy, but i took silent time to just be.  and now here i am, and the apartment did get clean.  everything moves, nothing stays the same.  so...lesson for me, don't get all down when things don't look or feel the way i want them to.  sit with myself.  and know that nothing is forever.  be flexible, vulnerable, and open.  receptive.  i may have an idea of what i want, but if i am open and receptive...the possibilities are infinite, and my idea of what i want could stifle that flow.  oh, i am rambling.  gotta get the kids ready for their last day at Bright Water School.
here's to cutting the fabric!

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