Sunday, July 4, 2010

Seattle?

I am really trying hard to enjoy my last few days in Seattle since the reality is I have no idea when I will be back.  I think we have every intention of returning here but Ian and I have been having some fun with the "what ifs"...where would we go if we did not come back to WA???....San Diego always is on the list so fun to think about that kinda stuff but we will see.  So I guess this is my second writing month blog about my move and well unfortunately not much to say different from the last one.  At this point I am not sure we will ever make it to Geneva.  Still no visas..grrr...they say soon but they always say soon so I really have no idea.  I leave for DC on Thursday and who knows I may need to enroll the kids in school there...I really hope it does not come to that.  My kids are super excited about going to DC...it should be hot and fun!  We spent the day in West Seattle at the beach.  It was cloudy and cool but fun anyway.  We still are not leaving Walter alone so we are being creative with places we can take him.  I know this may sound nuts to you nondog loving people but my dog makes me so happy....I just love him!  So having him around has been good for me.  The kids had fun playing in the sand and water...my god they were a mess.  You know some interesting things about me is that I really want to enjoy the beach, pool...etc but the reality is that hmmm not so much.  The beach is just so messy and the pool well swimming in a public pool is not something I will ever do by choice.  It is not so bad that I won't get in or take my girls but I do what I can to avoid it...just seems gross to me.  See it is interesting that I would even want to go back to San Diego as it is mostly beach, pool, and sun but I do like the idea or lifestyle of all of those things.

So this is my second full week of not working...parts of it I love and parts are really hard.  I miss it terribly...I do love spending the time with the girls but it is the balance I miss.  It was not just a job to me but part of my identify...something that filled me up..something I was good at.  My families were so generous with lovely thank you cards and gifts..I felt appreciated in every way and will miss them all.

So my 4th of July gift is NOT having to go see fireworks.  Ian is going to take the girls to Bellevue park and I will have some mama time.  I have been keeping to myself lately and really enjoying the time.  I like being alone...I think I have always been that way.  I finally have decided not to try to be someone I am not but just do things I like or that make me feel like me.

So 4 more days to go....I will continue to wonder if I will return to Seattle so I will enjoy it while I can!

xxoo-Dina

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