The Baumgart's hosted the last poker night of May this past Sunday. And like another lyric to the song I have been humming when it comes to my blog post titles of late, "And I'm comin' on the biggest fool of them all." See, when it comes to poker, I feel like a winner. I sit at the table and everything about how I feel when I get my cards and put my chips in, or even when I fold...everything just says winner in my head. But I lose. I have not won a singe game since poker month started.
I do feel like I have learned more about the game and the strategy, and therefor, I have found myself being second in line to the big money the last two games. But still, like Jerry Seinfeld said in one his sitcom episodes, "Who wants to come in second? Who wants the Silver medal? It's like you get to tell everyone, I was the best loser. Of all the losers, I came in first."
|What did you do, Alex?|
I was sitting pretty with a couple big wins under my belt and thought I was in the clear as far as Bob went. That winner feeling I carry was starting to read more like a non-fiction short story and less like the romance novel in my head.
The last hand was dealt. I had two aces in the hole...sweet. I was still keeping my poker face on though. The river gets dealt and guess what? It is another ace!
"Holy shit!" I am thinking "I am finally going to win."
I dream of how perfect it all is, the last game, all my poker studying paying off, something really good to blog about.
I bet big, I got this.
In the end, I think it was just me and Karyn that hadn't folded. Bob did, even though his pile of chips was getting big yet again...but that was fine with me, because after this win, I had it all. Time for the showdown.
Karyn flipped her cards and announced with a huge smile, "I got a flush."
"A flush! A fucking flush!" I sink inwardly as I mumble to myself.
"That beats three of a kind. Even three aces." I say out loud.
And now, not to sound all non-evil, cause like Karyn said to me that night across the poker table, "I love that you're evil." But seeing her smile from that win, after all of her threes and queens in the hole all night, gave me that winner feeling all over again.
We'll have other poker nights. Maybe I'll win. Maybe I won't. I still can't say I have let go of the intense winner feeling, or the desire to make it a reality. I am thinking monthly games. And maybe a bigger buy-in...if I get better.